Diary of a Mother's Mission

My son, Kevin Martin, disappered under mysterious circumstances in the wee hours of July 18, 2004. His partial remains were found on February 1, 2005 in the river. The Des Moines Police have not been helpful and this is my blog to tell what I have done as it's done.

Saturday, April 15, 2006

What Does It All Mean

Everything is in full bloom in Des Moines. We had those couple of days of severe weather and inches of rain followed by a week of above normal 70 and 80 plus degrees temperature. I don't pay attention to the weather as much during the warm weather months (no freezing roads) but I think tomorrow, Easter Sunday, is suppose to be a beautiful day. The daffodils and Magnolia trees are still blooming but some of them are dying already. They blossomed, lost their leaves, and that's it untill next year. Maybe that's what we do to. I tried to "dry" a couple of the Dahlias that Mr. Harper had given me last Novenber, to preserve what I thought was an incredibly beautiful flower, but it didn't work. I guess that's what really bothers me about flowers, they don't last long enough. Incredibly beautiful and then they wither and die in a very short time.

This is going to be a particularly beautiful Easter as it is late(in April) and so many flowers are in bloom.

If I was planning to attend an Easter Sunday sevice I guess I would go to Pastor Arontsen's church. The pastor who was at Kevin's memorial service. But I won't. Instead I'll take my long walk and appreciate all the beautiful flowers and think of Kevin in light of the Resurrection. What the Resurrection means to me and what Kevin's life and loss means to me. And I guess what it means to me is that we (our spirit, our true self) out-lives our body. We rise from the dead as Jesus Christ did. And Kevin's spirit, his true self, is alive and immortal.

Also when I get up in the morning I'll re-read the chapter in Emmett Fox's book, "The Power of Constructive Thinking" on life after death. It's very positive and uplifting. He was a pastor in New York City around 1950, I believe. It's spiritual writing and his interpretation of prayers and bible stories. So, what does it all mean? I guess we spend our entire life trying to figure that out and especially when we have an horrendous loss in our life, the loss of Kevin, the question becomes more pronounced and urgent.

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