Diary of a Mother's Mission

My son, Kevin Martin, disappered under mysterious circumstances in the wee hours of July 18, 2004. His partial remains were found on February 1, 2005 in the river. The Des Moines Police have not been helpful and this is my blog to tell what I have done as it's done.

Saturday, June 02, 2007

A Very Special Comment

I just read this very special comment again. I read it a while ago, although not too long ago. It was recently written. Brian tried to find out who this person was, but couldn't. Recently they changed things on the "Blogger" site that I go to. I had to call Kevin's stepmother to find out what to do. Under the old format, I know, there was something about "comments" but I didn't know how to access them without being afraid that I would mess things up. My knowledge of computers is very limited and so I stick with what I know how to do, which isn't very much. This comment was written after my Spring Babies blog. I've thought about it so often since I read it, and am amazed and thrilled that someone would remember Kevin that well and take the time to write a comment about him after so many years. Obviously I hope so many people remember him, I know they do, intellectually that is, but it isn't until you get something like that, a comment, or someone stops you and says something to you, which has been rare, only twice, that you fully realize that, yes, people still really do remember him. It means so much as I think I've said before. Most of the time I'm alone with my thoughts and memories of Kevin and then periodically, as happened with this wonderful comment, I feel a sense of connectedness with someone else who knew Kevin. I wish this person would tell me more but I don't want to intrude on their privacy either.

Mother's Day has passed. The day after Kevin's memorial service, 2005, was Mother's Day, May 8th that year. I wanted to go to A-Dong, Kevin's favorite place for lunch, but didn't make it with lots of loose ends to finish up before returning to New York. Last year I did and this year, as well, and so Mother's Day has become, for me, a special day of remembrance and reflection regarding him. I'll never forget that Mother's Day that he and I shared in 2003, I think it was. He went walking with me that morning, and it was a cool chilly morning that year, and then we went to A-Dong for lunch. It has become such a special day, so this will be my Mother's Day, each year, as it has been for the last two.

I've thought so much about Kevin's friends, the few I did know, and the special people that became involved with his life, like the wonderful fisherman who found his remains. And then there are friends of Kevin, like the person who wrote the comment, that I don't know, but would like to. I still need to get in touch with them. Most of the time I have a hard time just doing my daily routine, work and chores, much less anything else. I don't even seem to make it to the library much anymore. On a day to day basis I struggle with my thoughts and memories. The loss of Kevin is mind boggling, to say the least, for me, and so I don't know how Kevin's young friends feel about his loss. There are really special people who have been involved with him and they have become part of my heart and his story as well. They have come to mean so much because it is that connectedness which helps ease the pain.

2 Comments:

Blogger Krissy said...

I do not know you or even knew Kevin, however I found your site somehow and added to my favorites and check it often. You express yourself with such honesty and that is awesome. I wish I could do the same to my daughter, who is 16 years old, but I am working on it and hope to get better someday. My heart goes out to you on the loss of your sons. I also wonder if you are okay when you don't write. God Bless You and keep up the wonderful memory of your son. I feel as though I knew him because of your beautiful writings.

6/6/07, 11:17 AM  
Blogger Lindsey said...

Good Morning Patricia,
I want to start off my saying I am so sorry about your loss and my heart goes out to you and your family, I knew Kevin when I was in High School and i am sure of course you knew this and the way you blog about him you definitely saw all the great qualities he offered to the world, he was just so Kind,Hilarious,Generous and just a all around good guy- and i am glad to have known him, i didn't know him the greatest or anything and we never hung out outside of school but I did share a few classes with him over the years and it was always a pleasure to get caught into a conversation with him i always left red faced from laughing,I found out about his passing from a friend of mine who also knew Kevin from school and when i was told it completely blew me away, I don't ever read the newspaper(to much saddness in it I have found) so I was unaware that he was even missing, but when I was told about this terrible loss, I found your blog when I was looking up info. about him, and i don't know you or anything but I just wish I could give you a big hug for all that you have gone through, your son was an amazing person - which i am sure he got from you and the way that you write about him and your life I'm sure you 2 were just alike, well I would just like to say again I am so sorry about your loss, and i wish you nothing but happiness and good things for your future,Kevin was a great person and one of the good ones which is hard to find these days and i am blessed that i got to meet him and talk to him-'

Lindsey

6/11/07, 8:42 AM  

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