Disconnected Thoughts and Other Things
Lately it has been difficult to get to the library, it seems. Yesterday I finally did some painting around the Hou. Trim mostly but a second coat which was sorely needed to give a more finished look. Still so much more to do but half a house isn't as daunting a task as large square footers. There is an advantage to small. It's cheaper to cover and fill.
It's raining again today. Nothing compared to the rain received in other parts of the country recently or months ago but more than we had last Summer. Last Summer was optimum to search the river. It was incredibly low. Unfortunately I didn't act soon enough plus I didn't know enough either. And I trusted which I shouldn't have done. I'm sure this isn't as important as I make it out to be. Even if Kevin's skull was found, found with what looked like trauma, the police would pass it off as being damage that occurred in the water. They have their mind-set and their mind SET. Last year I cried when the river rose. I feel like crying today. I love the rain which makes everything fresh and green, and Des Moines needs it, but in this case each drop, each rain fall decreases the chance of finding anything, even diminishes any attempts at a search.
1505 Pleasant St. is officially 821 16th St. Well, I know nothing about officialdom, and / or how official it is but I guess it must be. Once again I missed the move itself but did see the house on the flat bed, then sitting next to the foundation and then resting on it's new foundation and home site. They brought in two more houses also, from 6th Ave. across from Mercy Hospital. They're right next to Kevin's house but there's "1505" sitting right smack next to 818 15th St., Kevin's home, right behind and next to the garage. That really tickles me! I love to walk by there on my walks.
1505 is gone from its usual spot. They're finally building the town house in the vacant plot next to 1505. The garages in back of 1505 are gone also. In front of 1503 there is a new sign advertising condominiums there, the same outfit who's building the townhouses on the corner. I had a terrible feeling inside. Life goes on, everything's changing. Sherman Hill is changing and I want it to stay the same. Keeping that sameness helps to preserve my memories of Kevin as we both lived in that area.
10 years later and it looks like they have the man who murdered Jon Benet Ramsey. So I guess there is still hope, except Kevin didn't have the kind of investigative quality that was given to the Ramsey case, ever.
Sunday I went to see "Pirates of the Caribbean". Kevin and I would have gone together to see that as well as the Superman movie. Earlier in the day I stopped at Barnes and Noble. I ran across a Sci-Fi book by C.S. Lewis, one of a trilogy, and I momentarily got so excited. I couldn't wait to tell Kevin and how could we have missed that! We had talked about C.S. Lewis a few time, Sci-Fi books a lot.
So, little bits and pieces that occur to me. Lately, not any major vibrant memories, just little things that strike me like the sconces. I can't remember the whole thing but I know it to be something related to Kevin. Something I shared with him. The house has been good but , yes, I am feeling very disconnected. I need to finish my house but I can't forget my goal no matter how disconnected and scattered I feel.
It's raining again today. Nothing compared to the rain received in other parts of the country recently or months ago but more than we had last Summer. Last Summer was optimum to search the river. It was incredibly low. Unfortunately I didn't act soon enough plus I didn't know enough either. And I trusted which I shouldn't have done. I'm sure this isn't as important as I make it out to be. Even if Kevin's skull was found, found with what looked like trauma, the police would pass it off as being damage that occurred in the water. They have their mind-set and their mind SET. Last year I cried when the river rose. I feel like crying today. I love the rain which makes everything fresh and green, and Des Moines needs it, but in this case each drop, each rain fall decreases the chance of finding anything, even diminishes any attempts at a search.
1505 Pleasant St. is officially 821 16th St. Well, I know nothing about officialdom, and / or how official it is but I guess it must be. Once again I missed the move itself but did see the house on the flat bed, then sitting next to the foundation and then resting on it's new foundation and home site. They brought in two more houses also, from 6th Ave. across from Mercy Hospital. They're right next to Kevin's house but there's "1505" sitting right smack next to 818 15th St., Kevin's home, right behind and next to the garage. That really tickles me! I love to walk by there on my walks.
1505 is gone from its usual spot. They're finally building the town house in the vacant plot next to 1505. The garages in back of 1505 are gone also. In front of 1503 there is a new sign advertising condominiums there, the same outfit who's building the townhouses on the corner. I had a terrible feeling inside. Life goes on, everything's changing. Sherman Hill is changing and I want it to stay the same. Keeping that sameness helps to preserve my memories of Kevin as we both lived in that area.
10 years later and it looks like they have the man who murdered Jon Benet Ramsey. So I guess there is still hope, except Kevin didn't have the kind of investigative quality that was given to the Ramsey case, ever.
Sunday I went to see "Pirates of the Caribbean". Kevin and I would have gone together to see that as well as the Superman movie. Earlier in the day I stopped at Barnes and Noble. I ran across a Sci-Fi book by C.S. Lewis, one of a trilogy, and I momentarily got so excited. I couldn't wait to tell Kevin and how could we have missed that! We had talked about C.S. Lewis a few time, Sci-Fi books a lot.
So, little bits and pieces that occur to me. Lately, not any major vibrant memories, just little things that strike me like the sconces. I can't remember the whole thing but I know it to be something related to Kevin. Something I shared with him. The house has been good but , yes, I am feeling very disconnected. I need to finish my house but I can't forget my goal no matter how disconnected and scattered I feel.
posted by Patricia | 8:52 AM
0 Comments:
Post a Comment
<< Home